The MOOCs

What the hell is a MOOC?  MOOC stands for massively open online course and they are offered by a variety of providers.  I started hearing more about them last summer, especially in all of the higher education literature.  I have all sorts of opinions on whether or not these services will make money or how much it will change higher education.  Some of my thoughts have evolved as I have taken different courses offered through Coursera.

I started off the MOOC adventure by taking an introduction to statistics course.  At the time, I was considering a second master's degree and suspected I would need a college level statistics course.  I've heard horror stories about statistics classes so I thought this would serve as a nice introduction to the topic.  I was also interested in checking out the MOOC madness.  Hundreds of thousands of people from all over the world registered for this class.  It was amazing to skim through the discussion forum and read entries on why people were taking the course.  I also learned that discussion forums can try my patience.  I think this forum was the worst of the four courses I have participated in.  People complained about everything -- the workload, using open source software that was confusing, figuring out the assignments, deadlines, and more complaints about deadlines.  I just wanted to scream at people that this was a free course taught by someone at Princeton.  Deal.  Honestly, I ended up sharing some of their frustrations but not because of the number of hours or lack of a certificate.  It was more than a little unorganized, which was not helped by some glitches with the Coursera software.  I felt bad for the graduate assistants who were helping the professor.  I definitely underestimated the workload but it wasn't until a problem until I went on vacation.  It was at the same time that the course content became  more challenging.  I ended up dropping the class.  My hope is that they work out a course schedule that is more organized so I can take it again.  I really liked the professor's lecture style, the assignments, and the emphasis on using R, the open source statistical software.  He was definitely more detached than the other instructors I've had since this first class.  He also got a little prickly on the course's Facebook page.  I can't say I blame him entirely based on some of the comments but still...

Next, I took an operations management class.  Looking back, I am not sure if this was really the best choice for me because I realized by the third week that I wasn't too interested in the topic.  This course was completely different from the statistics one in that the professor was much more involved in responding to questions on the discussion forums.  Again, this was a course that had a large number of people who registered from all over the world.  I basically stopped the lectures and quizzes around the time of the mid-term.

I am close to finishing up my third course, principles of public health.  I love this class.  The lectures are engaging, the discussion forum is interesting to read, and the professor is very into this effort.  I actually look forward to her weekly emails to the thousands of people taking the course.  It has sparked my interest in epidemiology so I am already planning on signing up for an epidemiology course.  The other cool thing about this course is how the global participation has made the discussion forum more interesting.  During the first week, I found it interesting to read what people thought of our country's public health issues, particularly in the area of nutrition.  I am going to finish this class but I decided not to complete the writing assignment.

I just started the next class on women in the civil rights movement.  This is a subject of great personal interest for me since it is something I have informally studied since I was a kid.  The course outline, lectures, and readings look very interesting.  As with the other classes, this one also takes a different approach in the style of video lectures and assignments.  This is also the first class that brings a librarian into the mix by offering a discussion forum topic for some of her university's librarians to advise on research topics.  I am not sure I will complete the research papers but I plan on completing all of the other assignments.

I suspect that a lot of students taking Coursera classes are like me.  They want to learn more about a subject, yet don't want to register for a course or program at a regular university.  I have signed up for a lot more courses on a wide range of topics.  At the very least, I have told myself to learn more about a topic and not stress about tests and assignments.

Last two books

 I've had an edition of this book around for years but never read it. This most recent edition came as part of an Indiespensable shipment (best book club ever). Because I am behind in everything, I am still reading books from awhile ago. I am embarrassed to admit that I had never read anything by George Eliot before. Well, that is all going to change after reading this novel.

 

I am one of the few individuals who has also never read anything by Jeffrey Eugenides. Middlesex? On my to-read list but hasn't happened. I know some people were letdown after reading his latest but the only expectations I had were from the positive reviews. This is one of those novels that did an amazing job depicting depression. I know there are a lot of things about this book to comment on but I want to focus on the character, Leonard. I found the story the most powerful when it shifted to Leonard's voice. I also think it perfectly captured the emotions of the people around him who struggle with helping him and feeling resentful of his illness.

When?

Not too long ago on Facebook a friend of mine posed a question on what advice you wish you could give your younger self.  For the last week I've thought a lot about the past and trying to figure out the period of time that I would to go back to and change things.  I know. I know. I really try to live life by looking forward and not dwelling on the past.  I am so much better about this as I get older but I haven't been able to shake this thought for the last week.  I would not go back to high school.  I was such an unhappy teenager who just wanted to throw everything away.  Those days are far too painful to go through again.  I wouldn't pick my University of Kansas or Kansas City days because I was far too lost.  I wasn't as unhappy as I was just lost.  

I would go back to my Chicago days when I was finishing up my undergraduate days. I had already experienced a lot of loss and struggled for years with different demons.  I was pulling myself together after so many years of not knowing what I wanted.  I was surrounded by family and meeting lifelong friends.  I had my health. I was just starting to develop awareness of who I was going to become. I had my dad. I would go back and just savor those days.  I wouldn't have wasted any minute of those three years. It wasn't a walk in the park even though I have let nostalgia creep in.  The last year of school was rough.  My dad's illness probably pulled me from the brink.  Actually, I know it did.  I was in crisis therapy -- four days a week for over three months.  But, it was also the most alive I have ever felt.  I also think I was at this crossroads when I was making decisions that would change the course of my life.  I stepped back from student teaching within a month of starting.  I made a decision on what to do for the year after college that led me down my current career path.  

Would I make those same decisions?  I have never regretted my decision of stopping the student teaching and not finishing my education degree.  It gave me a chance to spend precious days with my dad in the last year of his life.  I do think the change I would probably reconsider is doing another stint in VISTA and going to library school.  I don't think it has the been most satisfying career in that I don't think I make that much of a difference in the world or find as much personal satisfaction as I wanted.  I miss my idealism.  I miss the passion I felt for certain things.  I think those were things that made me a better person. 

I've made a lot of bad decisions since those days in my mid to late twenties.  I've also made some good ones.  Six years ago almost to the day, I was forced to make a fairly big decision of leaving New York and New Jersey for a return to either Chicago or move to Oregon. As much as I miss Chicago, I know that moving here was the healthiest choice at that time.  I was at one of the lowest points of my life.  Am I entirely healed from all of that?  Not 100% but getting there.  I recently decided that I need to approach big decisions with a little more thoughtfulness.  I know I can't get back my youth or recreate relationships based on who we all were back in those days. But, I am trying to get some of that spirit back.  I also keep thinking of my recent thoughts of what lessons I would take from the present and try to inject in the past.  I just don't want my future self looking back at this time in my life with regrets because that is my biggest fear --- that at the end of my life, I will have more regrets than moments of satisfaction.